“Super 8″ takes place in the summer of 1979 in a small Ohio town. Joe Lamb (Joel Courtney) is a middle school kid who has just had to deal with the death of his mother in a steel mill accident. His father, Deputy Sheriff Jackson Lamb (Kyle Chandler), is left to deal with his son alone, which is not a job he was quite ready for. On top of their already awkward relationship, Jackson doesn’t really know what to make about Joe and his group of movie-making friends.

You see, Joe and his friends are making a homemade zombie movie with a super 8 camera. In an effort to add an emotional element to his story, director/writer Charles (Riley Griffiths) enlists Alice (Elle Fanning) to be the female lead in the movie. After sneaking out at midnight for Alice’s first night of filming, the auteurs witness a horrific train derailment. During the chaos, their super 8 camera falls over and continues to film the entire crash.

After the dust settles, Joe sees something escape from one of the train cars that is definitely not small. That is where the mystery begins and the boys and Jackson start unraveling a conspiracy involving a very nasty Air Force General (the best Noah Emmerich has ever been), constant power outages, and a small town in a panic as their dogs and neighbors start disappearing. There isn’t a wasted moment as each scene furthers the plot and fleshes out each character, mostly Joe and Alice.

While there is plenty of fantastic action and great special effects, this movie works solely because of this group of kids. Joel Courtney has never appeared in a movie before and there is rarely an emotional moment in the movie that isn’t on his shoulders. He’s the main character and he handles the role just fine. If I had one problem with “Super 8″, it’s that Kyle Chandler and Ron Eldard (Alice’s father) seemed very underused. A few more scenes with either of these characters would have been great.

If there is going to be one breakout star from this movie, it’s Elle Fanning. There is one moment early on that just screams of megastardom. She goes from funny, to serious, to emotional in about twenty seconds and it’s very impressive.

While the train crash is worth the cost of the ticket alone, in the end, “Super 8″ is a monster movie. However, it stands out due to excellent casting, well written characters, and the care from J.J. Abrams to make sure that we are being told an effective story, in addition to the scares.

However, my favorite moment involved four boys cursing and throwing food at each other over lunch, just being 13-year old boys. But Joe and Alice ignored all of it. They talked about the crash like adults and were just two kids crushing on each other. It’s the type of moment that does exactly what great movies do: those aren’t characters anymore, those are your friends and you are in that moment with them. It’s moments like these that make “Super 8″ complete movie magic.

“Super 8″ is the next movie from writer/director J.J. Abrams and virtually nobody can tell you what it really is about. Is it an alien movie? Is it a monster movie? What exactly is trying to bust out of that train? Secrecy has become a staple of anything that Abrams is involved with and I think his movies are better for it.

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that this movie was filmed where I grew up, which means that I did in fact grow up in West Virginia. Please do not hold that against me.

I suppose I should put a nice little SPOILER ALERT tag on this, as there are still people who haven’t seen the “Lost” series finale. Get thee to Hulu, watch the damned thing, then come find out what other tidbits Darlton have in store for fans.

One of the great bits revealed in the finale was Hugo Reyes’ eventual guardianship of the Island, and Ben Linus finally being asked to participate in protecting it as well, as Hurley’s “number two.” Now, we might get a look at what that partnership looks like.

During a post-”Lost” appearance on G4′s “Attack Of The Show,” Michael Emerson talked about a special feature on the Season Six DVD:

For those people that want to pony up and buy the complete Lost series, there is a bonus feature. Which is um, you could call it an epilogue. A lost scene. It’s a lot; it’s 12 or 14 minutes that opens a window onto that gap of unknown time between Hurley becoming number one and the end of the series.

Sorry, but that alone is worth buying the season box in Blu-Ray. Granted, it’s not the James Ford and Miles Straume detective show I’m really hoping for, but it’ll definitely do.

Previously: The last episode happened. And before that, six seasons happened.

Island Timeline

On the Island, everyone pretty much runs around, getting their physical bearings. Sawyer volunteers to retrieve Desmond from the well while Jack, Kate and Hurley head to the Source tunnel. When Kate asks why Jack took the job, Jack says it’s because it’s the only thing in his life he hasn’t managed to ruin. “Nothing’s irreversible,” Kate intones. Hurley: “This would be so sweet if we weren’t all about to die.” Yep.

Sawyer is intercepted by Ben and NotLocke, who are also looking dumbly at the well. NotLocke and Sawyer poke at each other about destroying the island, which is the first time Ben has considered that NotLocke meant it literally. Sawyer beats up Ben once more for old times’ sake, grabs his gun and bolts. NotLocke and Ben follow some dog tracks to… Bernard, Rose and Vincent’s cabin! Somehow, Bernard, Rose and/or the luckiest dog in the world got Desmond out of the well; they’ll give him breakfast, and then he needs to be on his way, because they don’t get involved. Why? I can tell you this one: Because unnecessary drama is bad news. Stuff like this tends to happen: NotLocke appears with his knife and threatens to kill Bernard and Rose if Desmond doesn’t come with him. Desmond shrugs and joins NotLocke.

Somewhere along the line, Sawyer catches up with his party. So two groups meet in a clearing on the way to the Source tunnel: Jack’s little version of Camp Jacob, consisting of himself, Kate, Hurley and Sawyer; and NotLocke, a quiet Ben and a weirdly cheerful Scotsman. Kate tries to shoot NotLocke; NotLocke suggests she save her bullets. Since they’re all heading in the same direction, they decide to go together, with the obligatory cross-talk threats and intonations about ends and death and stuff. Privately, Sawyer asks Jack what’s going on. Jack is betting that if Jacob brought Desmond back, he’s some kind of a weapon. (Sawyer: “Hell of a long con, Doc.” He should know.) At the edge of the bamboo forest, NotLocke strongly suggests that only he, Jack and Desmond continue the rest of the way. It goes without saying that he flashes his knife.

While this is happening, Miles finds Richard by the New Otherton barracks. Richard’s dazed, but nothing that will keep him out of the finale. Miles and a twitchy Richard jump into an outrigger and start paddling towards Hydra. Along the way, among some submarine debris, they find Frank, patiently floating on a bunch of life rafts. (Have to say it: Told you so.) New plan: Get to Hydra with Frank, fix the Ajira plane and get the hell off of Dodge. On the Hydra beach, they encounter a brooding Claire, who fires waring shots and declines to come with them.

Jack, NotLocke and Desmond arrive at the tunnel with a plan to find out who’s right about life, the island and everything: Lower Desmond over the edge of the waterfall, and have him walk towards the light. Desmond grins and gibbers about how he’s going to be going somewhere else, somewhere they can all be with the ones they love and never have to worry about the island again, a place where Oceanic 815 never crashed and Jack sees happy. Jack patiently explains that there are no shortcuts; what happened, happened, and all of this matters. Right, then. Down goes Desmond, while NotLocke and Jack snark to each other about whether or not Original Recipe Locke was right then, and which one is right right now.

At the bottom, Desmond walks past some skeletons to this shining pool with a little carved plinth or something in the middle. For some reason, he decides he has to wade through the pool and remove the pillar, even though he sustains a serious electric shock when he steps into the water. Clearly, he didn’t get the memo about the cork and the wine bottle, because when he does? The golden light goes out, replaced by a red one, and flames, and smoke, which seem to be emanating from the vaguely demon-shaped hole the pillar was stopping up. Also, the Island starts shaking. Frequently, and a lot.

Jack and NotLocke duck out of the tunnel for a tussle, and could it be any more obvious that most of those rocks are painted styrofoam? Sorry, back to suspending disbelief. We’ve come so far; why stop now? Oh, also, NotLocke can suddenly bleed again. He takes a rock, bashes Jack over the head and runs.

A quake topples a tree in the little waiting clearing. Ben pushes Hurley out of the way and finds himself trapped beneath the timber. Kate, Sawyer and Hurley have a tough time moving it, but a radio transmission from Miles apparently gives them the off-screen mojo to move it. Because if they’re going to get to Hydra in time for take-of, they’re going to need to get on NotLocke’s boat.

Jack tracks NotLocke to the cliffs, and they have this epic fight — and did I mention that this is all at the edge of a freakin’ cliff? A cliff which is actually starting to crumble into the sea? A quake results in NotLocke’s knife ending up a bit away. The tussle continues. NotLocke regains control of the knife, stabs Jack in the side, draws blood from his throat, and is taunting Jack about dying for nothing when an approaching, pissed off Kate shoots NotLocke. Jack kicks him over the side of the cliff, where he lies, broken and still, on a plateau below.

This does not stop the quakes. If anything, the Island’s even more temperamental.

Hurley, Ben, and Sawyer join Jack and Kate. Jack thinks that whatever Desmond turned off, he needs to turn back on; if that doesn’t work, everyone really should be on that plane. New plan: Everyone but Jack gets off the Island. Ben declines to leave the Island, and Hurley declares he’s with Jack. So Jack and Kate have an epic kiss and love fest, and Sawyer and Kate head for the boat – which ultimately involves jumping off a cliff, because time’s running short: Frank wants to leave the ground while there’s still ground to get off. He sends Richard and Miles to fix some hydraulics with a page of instructions and a roll of duct tape. Richard is a bit incredulous, but Miles says perhaps the wisest words ever uttered on this show: “I don’t believe in a lot of things, but I do believe in duct tape.”

Trailed by Ben, Hurley helps Jack back to the Source tunnel. Jack explains that he’s going alone. Hurley is aghast: How’s Jack going to survive if Desmond didn’t make it? Half a second later, Hurley realizes the answer. “Hurley, I’m already dead,” Jack patiently explains, clutching his wounded side. “This is the way it happens. This is what I’m supposed to do.” Hurley stubbornly insists that the Island needs Jack. Jack thinks it needs Hurley, adding that he believes in Hurley. Hurley agrees to take on the Island, but he’s pulling out as soon as Jack comes back. Ben produces a water bottle so Jack can give him a drink from the stream. Jack places a hand on Hurley’s shoulder: “Now you’re like me.”

Hurley and Ben lower Jack, though thanks to another quake, Jack hits the ground with a definite thud. He finds Desmond lying next to the empty pool. Jack starts dragging Desmond back to the rope as Demond explains that the pillar thing needs to go back in the hole at the bottom. Desmond thinks he has to do it himself, but Jack sends Desmond back to be with his wife and son. And Jack? “I’ll see you in another life, brother,” Jack tells him, and finishes tying the rope around Desmond’s waist.

Kate and Sawyer straggle up to the Hydra beach, where Claire is sitting. They can hear Frank starting up the plane. Kate insists Claire come with them, promising to help Claire with her re-entry into the world of sanity and motherhood. The three of them make it to the plane just in the nick of time, joining Richard and Miles in the main cabin. Kate holds Claire’s hand, and the plane takes off, just clearing a mountain.

Jack replaces the pillar, then collapses in the empty pool. The red light and fire and smoke continue for a bit, and then the water starts pouring in and the golden light returns. Ben and Hurley pull up what they think is Jack, but is, of course, Desmond. Hurley’s a tad distraught, realizing that Jack’s gone. Ben, tending to Desmond, explains that Jack did his job — and now it’s Hurley’s. “What the hell am I supposed to do?” Hurley cries. Ben suggests he do what he does best: Take care of people, starting by helping Desmond get home. But how, if people can’t leave the Island? Well, Ben points out, that’s what Jacob thought. Maybe there’s a better way. Hurley asks Ben to be his Number Two. Ben is honored.

Jack wakes up on the stream bank. We’ll get back to him soon.

That Sideways Timeline

Everyone pretty much runs around, getting their social networking bearings. As they watch Christian’s casket being delivered to the church, Desmond won’t give Kate any answers about why she’s there, though she does get a good laugh out of the name “Christian Shephard.” Jack will be late to the concert at the museum, what with operating on Locke, so David will go with Claire and his mother — Juliet, of course, a fellow doctor at the only hospital in Los Angeles, with whom Jack still has a friendly relationship. WIth Sayid in tow, Hurley picks up the drunk Drive Shaft bassist (a tranquilizer dart is involved), and they all head to the museum. There, Miles catches sight of Sayid and calls the guy I’m still calling Sawyer to check up on Jin and Sun.

Juliet administers an ultrasound to Sun, and she has flashbacks of the ultrasound Juliet gave her on the island. Upon seeing the ultrasound, Jin has similar flashes of their Island life. They suddenly speak perfect English.

Juliet’s called back to the hospital, so it’s just David and Claire joining Desmond and Kate at table 23 when the concert starts. Kate’s a little weirded-out about seeing Claire again. Claire is more focused on not giving birth, when she’s not wondering why Charlie’s (who was roused by Charlotte just in time for the show, giving the writers an excuse to have her meet Daniel) looking at her from the stage. She excuses herself, and Kate follows her to a backstage area, where she almost collapses. Yep, that baby’s coming now. Charlie materializes in time for Kate to send him for water and blankets. Kate coaches Claire through the quickest childbirth ever, and they both get flashes of delivering Aaron on the island. Charlie rejoins them with blankets in time to get the rest of his island flashes of Claire and Aaron. The three of them coo at each other. Kate looks kind of blissed-out.

Eloise sits beside Desmond, making it clear she’s not happy about all this. But Desmond says he won’t take Daniel with him, so she doesn’t throw a fit or anything.

Locke wakes up from his surgery the second he’s in his room, to Jack’s consternation and amusement. The fact that Locke can already feel and move his feet? That’s just plain weird. But not as weird as those quick flashes Jack gets of Locke watching his foot move on the Island. Also, Jack has another one of those weird cuts on his neck – which is exactly where Locke’s knife cut him on the cliff.

Hurley makes sure that Sayid sees a fight outside a bar and feels compelled to jump out and rescue a damsel in distress. The damsel is Shannon. The fight was orchestrated by Hurley and Boone, who watch as Sayid and Shannon get their own flashes.

When Sawyer finds Jin and Sun at the hospital, they are cheerfully on their way out the door. Which is kind of weird. Jack points Sawyer to a vending machine for some food. The vending machine promptly eats his dollar, leaving him wrestling the machine for his Apollo bar. Juliet materializes with some suggestions. They touch, and get their flashes, and kiss, and we hear both sides of Juliet’s dying mumbles from the season opener, suggesting they go out for coffee, dutch.

Jack arrives at the museum; he runs into Kate, who informs him that the concert’s over. He tries to figure out where he knows her from. She reminds him that they were on the same flight, and she stole his pen – but says that’s not where. She touches Jack’s face, delivering a few more island flashes. He’s seriously freaked out. Kate smiles patiently. “I know you don’t understand, Jack. But if you come with me, you will.”

Locke arrives at the church via cab. Ben sits outside, looking in. Ben tells Locke that “most of them” are inside. And he apologizes for what he did to Locke: He was selfish and jealous. Locke was special, and he wasn’t. “Well, if it helps, Ben, I forgive you,” Locke says, and Ben tells him that it does help. Ben opts to “stay here for a while,” and tells Locke he probably doesn’t need the wheelchair anymore. Ben’s right. After Locke goes in, Hurley comes out and invites him in. Ben declines. Before he goes back in, Hurley tells Ben, “You were a real good Number Two.” Ben returns that Hugo is a great Number One.

Jack and Kate pulls up at the church — the church where he was going to have his father’s funeral. Kate sends him around the back, and says they’ll all be waiting for him inside when he’s ready.

In the church, Jack walks into an office or something. There may be a more proper name, but never mind. In any case, the name probably doesn’t apply, as this particular church office is decorated not just with crosses, but with a menorah and a stained glass window featuring the symbols of several major world religions. Also, Christian’s casket is there. Jack gets more Island flashes when he puts his hands on the casket, from Season One stuff to kissing Kate goodbye. Jack takes a breath, opens the casket, and… it’s empty. “Hey, Kiddo,” a voice says, and Jack turns to see his father.

(Was anyone who’s ever read or seen an epic work of sci-fi surprised by that? Every one of them involves a scene near the end when a friendly authority figure summarizes the world. Christian isn’t particularly friendly, but he is family, so that will have to be enough.)

Jack starts firing off questions: If Christian died, then how is he here right now?

“How are you here?” Christian asks back.

“I died,” Jack realizes, starting to cry. They hug, in a way they probably never did when they were alive. Jack asks if Christian is real. Christian explains that both of them are real – and that everything that’s ever happened to him is real, and all those people in the church are here, too. Jack’s caught on the whole “everyone’s dead” thing.

“Everyone dies sometime, Kiddo,” Christian explains, patiently. “Some of them before you, some long after you.” There is no “now” here: “This is a place where that you all made together so you could find one another. The most important part of your life was the time that you spent with these people.” That’s why they’re here: “Nobody does it alone.” They need each other to remember, to let go, to move on. Where are they going? “Let’s find out.”

Jack and Christian go into the church, where pretty much the whole cast is there, hugging and reuniting. (And by “pretty much the whole cast” I mean everyone from Jack and Locke through Desmond and Penny. Everyone is paired or family united up. The exceptions seem to be Michael, who’s stuck on the Island; Walt, who I think has put all this behind him; and Vincent, because dogs probably have a completely different vision of the afterlife. And Mr. Eko, because: Who?)

On the island, Jack staggers through the bamboo. We flash back and forth a few times: Stumble; hugs; straggling; smiling; careening; hand-holding; collapsing. Island Jack lies on the ground among the bamboo, hears a bark: Vincent. Vincent lies down next to Jack. Jack sees the airplane flying overhead and smiles.

Christian walks up the church aisle and opens the door. There’s a bright, bright light, that fills the sanctuary, until all we can see is the suffusion of white.

On the Island, Jack’s eye closes. As you knew it would.

As the credits roll, we see the rusted remains of Oceanic 815.

The Bad Robot is silent.

So. To sum up:

• The Sideways world is kind of an afterlife holding area – not so much Purgatory as a really fancy waiting room – where everyone hangs out, waiting for their loved ones. All the Sideways coincidences and flashes have been part of the process of these people remembering why they’re so important to each other, and of letting go.
• The Island was real.
• Vincent is the best dog ever, except maybe that one you had when you were a kid.
• People are connected.
• Everything ends.

I need sleep. I have more to say, but I’m seriously drained. In the meantime: Thoughts? Questions? Thank-you gifts?

Make Your Own Kind Of Music

The White Rock Coffee House hosts Christine Hand and Adam Jones Saturday night, with a “‘Lost’ Acoustic Countdown.” They’ll have songs in the set list from Three Dog Night and Mama Cass to Patsy Cline and Drive Shaft. Their set starts at 8:00 pm, and should be a wonderful way to anchor a weekend of “Lost.”

Develop The Ben Linus Method Of Speech

When he wants to be, Michael Emerson is a completely creepy bastard. As Ben Linus, he’s been the morally ambiguous focal point of our empathic fears on The Island from the moment he fell out of the tree, pretending to be Henry Gale. MTV Movies had a feeling that anything Ben Linus says would make you want to crawl out of your skin… and they’re right.

Mourn The Brave Departed

Jezebel.com realized the body count for “Lost” is breathtaking, and decided to set it to the music of the late punk poet laureate Jim Carroll. Kudos for giving Ben his own verse!

Attention: we interrupt this wrap-up with more Sawyer’s nicknames:

Get Caught Up

Okay, you’re late to the party, and haven’t seen one damned episode of “Lost” – yet you want to come out to the Angelika and see what all of the fuss is about. You could either watch Sunday’s appetizer to “The End,” called “The Final Journey” (which really should be titled “Who Are We Kidding? We’re Trying To Boil Six Years Of TV Into 120 Minutes!”) at 6:00 pm CT… or, you can read Entertainment Weekly’s “Ten Essential Episodes” (co-written by premier Lostologist Doc Jensen) and hope Netflix Streaming and Amazon Unbox can get you to the church on time.

ISLAND TIMELINE

It’s the morning after the night before on the beach. Flotsam from the sub washes up on the shore while Jack stitches up Kate. (And we all know that this is a reflection of Kate stitching Jack up during the pilot, so let’s not dwell.) Kate’s still in shock about Sun and Jin, mostly because this leaves their daughter an orphan. They agree: NotLocke’s going down. And, as Jack points out, if NotLocke wants Desmond dead, then making sure that they get to him first is a good place to start.

It’s the morning after several episodes before in the jungle. Ben, Miles and Richard approach the old barracks. Ben and Miles are bickering. Richard wants to cut to the explosive chase: How much C-4 is there, and is Ben sure it’s still there? Enough to destroy the plane, and yes. Exposition Miles snarks about Ben putting the explosives in a cookie jar, to which Ben replies: “Don’t be ridiculous. It’s in a secret room behind my book case.” And for delivering that line with a perfectly straight face, I hereby nominate Michael Emerson for every Emmy ever. As they approach Ben’s old house, Miles starts getting some serious dead people signals. Richard explains that it’s Alex. I’m sure she has a lot to say, but this episode’s already running long.

They duck into the closet so Ben can retrieve the C-4 from a safe. Then they hear a noise out in the house. It’s Zoe, followed closely by Widmore. Widmore shoos Zoe off to get their equipment from their outrigger, then scoffs at Richard for being so far behind on the whole “blow up the plane” idea. How did Widmore manage to get back onto the island? He was invited by Jacob, who convinced Widmore of the error of his ways and told him he was needed for the purpose. So, here he is. And then Zoe notifies Widmore that NotLocke’s on his way.

There is a general scurrying. Widmore ushers Zoe into the secret room, but Ben declines, on the notion that NotLocke is going to want to have a throwdown with him eventually, and he’d rather get it over with. Miles is all, yeah, um, hi, I’m leaving. Ben sends him off with a radio. Richard joins Ben outside; he figures that all NotLocke really wants is for Richard to join him, so he may be able to buy everyone else some time.

Ben and Richard go outside. With little ceremony, Smokey zooms in, tackles Richard and flings him somewhere far offscreen. If Richard really can’t die, then he’s going to be seriously banged-up for the finale. Ben calmly waits for NotLocke, who says that he needs Ben to kill some people for him. If Ben does, he can have the Island all to himself. Ben ponders for about half a second before pointing NotLocke to the closet where Widmore and Zoe are hiding.

In the not-so-secret closet, NotLocke and Widmore face off. Widmore tells Zoe not to talk to NotLocke, so NotLocke slashes her throat, because if she’s not going to talk, then what’s the point to her existence? (And this is where my future essay on “Lost” and gender issues really starts gathering steam in the back of my brain. I know it’s not one of the many points of the show, but when you think about it, the whole thing’s one big Bechdel Test fail.) NotLocke lays it out to Widmore: If Widmore doesn’t tell NotLocke what he wants to know, NotLocke will kill Penny. If Widmore does, he won’t. Widmore easily admits that he brought Desmond back to the Island because of his resistance to electromagnetism, as a measure of last resort. He won’t say any more in front of Ben, so NotLocke asks Widmore to whisper the rest to him. Which he does. And then Ben shoots him: “He doesn’t get to save his daughter.” NotLocke shrugs that he already found out what he needed to know, so no harm done. “Good,” Ben says, flatly. “Did you say there were some other people for me to kill?”

Meanwhile, on presumably the same day, Jack and Sawyer lead the walk ‘n’ talk on the way to find Desmond. Sawyer feels responsible for killing everyone on the sub; Jack continues to put the blame on NotLocke. Somewhere behind them, Hurley sees the adolescent Jacob. While Kate walks on, the apparition demands the ashes that Hurley took from Ilana’s stuff. Hurley’s curious as to why the kid wants him, but the kid just takes the bag and runs off. Hurley follows the kid as best he can and finds Jacob among clearly artificial flowers by a campfire. Hurley asks whether Jacob saw a kid run by with his ashes. “My ashes are right there in that fire,” Jacob says, placidly. “When it burns out you’ll never see me again.” And: “Tell your friends, we’re very close to the end, Hugo.” Across the interwebs, hundreds of Lost recappers thank Jacob for giving them this week’s recap title.

Kate, Sawyer and Jack catch up with Hurley and Jacob. Jacob greets the others, and Hurley’s surprised that they can all see each other. Hey, kids, let’s play Riddles by the Fire! To their questions, Jacob answers that, yes, he wrote those names on the wall. So is that why they’re dead? Yeah, sorry. But he wants them to know that Sun, Jin and Sayid didn’t die for nothing. And if they have a collective seat, Jacob will tell them why he chose all of them. Oh, also? By the time the fire goes out, one of them is going to have to start protecting the Island.

Hurley wants to know why Jacob brought them to the Island. Jacob replies that it’s because of a mistake he made a long time ago; and, now, that mistake might kill them and everyone they care about. That mistake? That would be Smokey. Jacob says he made Smokey that way, and Smokey’s been trying to kill him ever since. (Only he doesn’t call him Smokey. But your recapper needs to call it something.)

Sawyer, playing the part of the wicked child in this foodless seder, snits about being punished for Jacob’s mistakes, maintaining that he was doing just fine before he got dragged to the Island. The group collectively stifles a psychic laugh. Jacob points out that they weren’t; they were all flawed and alone, like him. “I chose you because you needed this place as much as it needed you.”

Kate asks why her name was crossed off. Jacob replies that it’s because she became a mother, but it’s just a line of chalk in a cave. The job’s hers if she wants it.

Jack inquires as to what the job is. It’s pretty straightforward: There’s a light at the center of the Island. The new hire will make sure that it never goes out. Contrary to what NotLocke says, there is something to protect it from. And if they don’t kill Smokey, then he’s going to try to kill them.

In answer to Hurley’s query about the applicant selection procedure, Jacob simply says that he’s going to give them all what he was never given: A choice. And if none of them chooses it? “Then this ends very badly.” After about half a second of contemplation, Jack announces that he’ll do it: “That’s why I’m here. This is what I’m supposed to do.” Jacob confirms Jack’s decision. Jacob and Jack head over to a stream or something, while Sawyer, Kate and Hurley watch from by the fire. Sawyer makes a weak crack about Jack’s God complex, but he seems to know how stupid he sounds before Kate hushes him. Hurley’s just glad he didn’t take the job. Dude, I know the feeling.

Jacob tells Jack that near where he first woke up on the Island, there’s a ridge, and past it is the light he needs to protect. Jack never saw anything beyond the ridge, but Jacob assures him that he’ll be able to get there. At Jacob’s request, Jack hands him a cup, which Jacob ritually fills with water from a stream. Before drinking, Jack asks how long he’ll have to do the job. “As long as you can,” Jacob responds. Finding this agreeable, Jack chugs the water. And though we don’t see what he sees, it’s clear that he’s now seeing things differently. “Now you’re like me,” Jacob solemnly intones, and both figuratively and literally passes Jack the torch.

NotLocke and Ben trek to the well to find Desmond gone. NotLocke says that Widmore told him that Desmond was a failsafe, Jacob’s last resort in case NotLocke managed to kill all the candidates, to make sure that NotLocke never leaves this place. But now, NotLocke has a new plan: He’s going to find Desmond, and Desmond’s going to help him destroy the Island.

THAT SIDEWAYS TIMELINE

Desmond’s on a mission. We don’t quite know what the mission is, but he’s definitely on it. While eating breakfast with Claire and David (who wants to make sure that Jack doesn’t act all weird when he sees David’s mother at his big concert tonight), Desmond calls Jack, posing as an Oceanic employee who says they found his cargo. Also, Jack has one of those weird scratches on his neck again.

Next up: Locke and Ben. Sitting in his car, Desmond watches Locke wheel across the parking lot. Ben recognizes Desmond as the man who ran Locke over. Desmond gets out and calmly starts beating up Ben. “I will not let you hurt Mr. Locke again,” Ben insists. “I’m not here to hurt him,” Desmond says between punches. “I’m here to help him let go.” Ben’s confusion is interrupted by a flash of getting beaten up by Desmond in another timeline.

Locke finds Ben getting stitched up in the nurse’s office. Locke’s all for calling the police, but Ben dissuades him: The man had told him that he wasn’t trying to hurt Locke; he was trying to help him let go — “and for some reason, I believe him.” This all clearly means something to Locke.

Alex runs into the injured Dr. Linus, declares him unfit to drive, and points out her mother’s car. Her mother — who is, of course, Danielle Rousseau — is happy to meet the famed Dr. Linus, and agrees with Alex that he should come over for dinner. “We insist, even if we have to kidnap you.” Nice one, writers.

After dinner at the Rousseau residence, Danielle explains that Alex’s father died when she was 2, which is probably why she’s so attached to Ben: With the interest he’s taken in her, he’s the closest thing Alex to a father that Alex has ever had. Ben gets all misty, though he lamely blames it on the onions. “I’ll put in less next time,” Danielle says. And though we don’t know the exact context, we know there will be a next time.

Locke goes to see Jack and runs down the list of coincidences that seem to connect them. (I don’t know why he’s so surprised that Jack turned out to be his doctor; there can’t be that many spinal surgeons on staff at the only hospital in all of Los Angeles.) The man who showed up at the school today said that he was there to help Locke let go, and that’s exactly what Jack said to Locke the last time they saw each other. So maybe all of this happened for a reason. Anyway, Locke’s ready to get out of the chair.

Desmond turns himself in at the police station (where Sawyer’s declining Miles’ invitation to that night’s concert at the museum, what with the possibility of running into Charlotte). Sawyer puts Desmond in a holding cell with Sayid and next to Kate. Desmond is very, very happy to see them. Sawyer returns to send them all off to the county lockup. He seems to consider Kate’s pleas to let her go, but soon enough, they’re all in the transport van. Desmond announces that it’s time to leave, that the driver knows where to stop, and that when that happens, the others are going to have to give him their trust. Kate and Sayid are very in.

So the van stops, the door opens, and it’s — Ana Lucia. They’re on a dock, I think. Ana Lucia uncuffs them as Hurley drives up with the bribe money. He recognizes Ana Lucia, but she doesn’t recognize Hurley. Desmond and Hurley quickly work out that Sayid will go with Hurley, and Kate will go with Desmond in Hurley’s Camaro. (Ana Lucia? “She’s not ready yet.”) Kate’s all, “Wha?” Desmond hands her a black dress and announces that they’re going to a concert.

Well. This should be good. Whatever happens in the finale, at least we’ll have some fine music — played, doubtless, by David, Daniel and Charlie; observed by everyone who was on the original flight, plus David’s mother — who I think we’re all assuming is Juliet.

Four days. Start reviewing.

This week, we get down to the real endgame, as Jack, Sawyer, Hurley and Kate recover from the Big Sub Boom in the ominously-titled “What They Died For,” the new episode of “Lost” airing Tuesday, May 18 at 8:00 pm CT.

ABC has posted a pair of previews for “What They Died For,” embedded below. Take a gander, then make plans to come to the Angelika to see the full episode for free Tuesday night at 8:00 pm CT. (Don’t forget to check out details the “Lost” series finale special event on Sunday, May 23, and register to win reserved seats.)

But I’ll try, because I love you that much.

Previously: Nothing happened.

It’s an old story, sibling rivalry. There’s a reason it keeps getting told: Whoever you are, it hits home. If you didn’t vie with a sibling, you probably had a frenemy in school. If you weren’t trying to get a parents’ approval, you’ve probably squared off for a promotion. So this is all going to sound very familiar, except possibly the part about the shipwreck.

Speaking of: There’s a shipwreck, of course. Isn’t there always a shipwreck? Along with the wreckage, a lone woman washes up. She’s wearing a toga-type thing, and she is, of course, very pregnant. She’s grateful to be cared for by weaver Allison Janney. Allison Janney is wearing a toga-type thing with a kind of net snood over a bun; between that, the newcomer’s name being Claudia — and, oh yes, all the Latin — we are given to understand that these are Roman times. Not particularly specific, but at least we have a general idea. Point is, this is a while back.

Claudia goes into labor, of course, and gives birth to a son: Jacob. She and Allison Janney are quite surprised to find that there’s another baby in there, too. Claudia had only thought of one name. She doesn’t live long enough to think of another one, thanks to Allison Janney apologetically ending her life with a rock.

(So what do we call this other kid in the recap? I guess we could go with Esau, but that’s mixing up our literatures. Quick glances at lists of Roman mythological characters reveal no apparent Jacob, or Jacobus, or Iakobus, with brothers. I’m just going to call him NJ: Not-Jacob. That’s sort of the point anyway.)

Off-screen, the twins are raised to early adolescence by Allison Janney, whom they call “Mother,” since that’s what she’s told them. So we will, too, because it’s their story, and because it’s faster than typing “Allison Janney”. Jacob is a towhead who wears light colors; the dark-haired Not-Jacob is a proto-Goth. Mother weaves things and tells her boys that the three of them are the only people on the island, and, further, that there’s nothing across the sea.

Jacob and Not-Jacob, like all mythological twins, love each other but seem to be competing for Mother’s affections. She definitely has her impressions of them: Jacob is the good boy, and Not-Jacob is… not Jacob. Which is not a bad thing.

Around the time that Jacob grows into that kid who will later haunt NotLocke, two things happen. First, Not-Jacob finds a box that contains a game with white and black rocks, bearing a superficial reference to backgammon. Not-Jacob asks Jacob not to tell Mother about it, but she gets Jacob to spill easily enough — as she tells Not-Jacob, Jacob doesn’t know how to lie; “he’s not like you.” So what does that make Not-Jacob? Per Mother, “Special.” Also, they’re never going to have to worry about “dead”.

Second, the boys learn that they’re not alone on the Island. When they ask Mother what was up with those mysterious men who felled the boar that they’d been chasing, she gets all muttery. The men don’t belong here, she says. They’re not like us; we’re here for a reason. She blindfolds the boys and leads them to that reason, muttering all the while about how the men always come and fight and corrupt, refusing to give a straight answer about where the came from. And then she pulls the blindfolds off and shows them the reason they’re there: At the end of a stream, there’s an entrance to a tunnel, and from it, golden light emits. It’s very Disneyland. Mother explains that they’re there to protect that light source, because if they don’t, then people will interfere with it, and then the spark of it in all men will die. But they can’t go in there. Someday, one of them is going to have to take over. (Jacob, paraphrased: “Cool.” Not-Jacob, paraphrased: “Huh? And, yeah, NO.”) Oh, and she’s made it so they can’t hurt each other. Remember how NotLocke said he had a crazy mother? I’m starting to see his point.

One day, the boys are playing the game. Not-Jacob has made up the rules, which don’t favor Jacob. Not-Jacob sweetly tells Jacob he’ll be able to make up his own rules one day. His next taunt is cut short when Not-Jacob gets a vision of his dead mother (not visible to Jacob), who tells him that not only is Mother not his mother, but that she’s been lying to him about there not being anything else out there. As proof, DeadMom leads Not-Jacob to a camp populated by her fellow passengers, the people who’d wrecked on another part of the island. She tells him that these are his people, that they came from across the sea.

To say that this all screws with Not-Jacob’s worldview is an understatement. He returns home and quietly tells Jacob they’re leaving. Jacob’s all, wait, what, nameless brother? Not-Jacob tells him that their lives are a lie, so Jacob beats him up. Mother pulls him off, and Not-Jacob confronts her with the whole origins thing. In the end, Not-Jacob leaves to be with his biological people, though Mother warns him that no matter what they tell him, they’ll never leave the Island. Jacob, ever the good boy, stays with Mother.

And this is how things go on for 30 years. The boys grow into Mark Pelligrino and Titus Welliver. Mother starts getting tired. Jacob pays visits to Not-Jacob, not sharing much with Mother. One day, as they play that game, Not-Jacob explains that the settlers are just as awful as Mother said, but they’re a means to an end. Not-Jacob is determined to leave the island, and he seems to be onto something. He illustrates by flinging his dagger against the side of a well, where it sticks, thanks to — I’m guessing — magnetism. Not-Jacob explains that when he and his people find spots where metal behaves strangely, they dig. Not-Jacob asks Jacob to come with him when he leaves, but Jacob stubbornly refuses to leave the only home he’s ever known. Back at that home, Mother, of course, knows where her golden boy’s been. Jacob tells her that Not-Jacob has found a way to leave the Island.

Mother goes to visit Not-Jacob. She finds him in the bottom of a well, where he’s tending a coal fire. Not-Jacob explains that since he’s never been able to find the Disneyland valley, they were digging to find the source of the light, and pries a rock out of the wall to reveal that they have. There’s the Frozen Donkey Wheel under construction, and Not-Jacob says something technical that works out to making bigger holes and channeling currents so he can get off the island. Or, um, something like that. Before he say anything sensible, Mother apologetically rams him into a wall, leaving him for dead.

So Jacob’s going to have to be the one to take care of the light — life, death, rebirth, the source, the heart of the island, Mother calls it at various times in the conversation. But he can’t go down there. She pours a cup of wine, mutters over it in Latin; and, since he doesn’t seem to think he has a choice, Jacob accepts the cup. Jacob has a sneaking suspicion that she really wanted Not-Jacob to do it, but he’s a good son and takes on the responsibility, agreeing to pick a successor when his time is over. This is all sealed with a sip of wine. “Now you and are the same,” Mother says.

Not-Jacob wakes up next to the well. The back of his head’s bloody, but since he can’t die, overall he’s none the worse for wear. He discovers that the well’s been filled in and the walls partially knocked down. How long was he out? And then he sees some smoke, and runs to it, and finds that the camp he’s called home for so long has been burned and its people slaughtered. It’s never said, but the implication is clear: This was Mother’s work. The only other possible suspect was Jacob, and that hot bundle of sweetness and light and listening to one’s mother? Pfft. Not-Jacob is distraught, but not so distraught that he doesn’t grab the game.

As you knew he would, Not-Jacob goes to the cave home and kills Mother with the dagger. In her dying moments, Not-Jacob asks Mother why she won’t let him leave. “I love you,” she says. And, “Thank you.”

When Jacob discovers Not-Jacob hovering over Mother’s body with a bloody dagger, he goes a little nuts, as you knew he would. He beats up the already-ragged Not-Jacob and takes him to the magical Disney valley. There’s some scuffling, and Jacob finally knocks him out. “You want to leave this place? Then go,” Jacob snarls, and shoves his brother down the stream, into the golden tunnel. And then… the light goes out. Good job protecting it, Jaco… holy hell, what was that? Why, that’s Smokey shooting out of of the tunnel. When Jacob finds Not-Jacob some distance away, Not-Jacob looks pretty dead.

Somberly, Jacob brings Not-Jacob’s body back to the cave, where he lays it next to Mother’s body. He leaves them there with a pouch containing a light stone and a dark stone from the game.

And, many years later, Jack and Kate discover Adam and Eve.

So, to sum up: The battle between Jacob and Smokey is sibling rivalry between the good son who wants to stay on the island like Mother said, and the bad boy who wants to leave. There’s a glowy light which is the “heart of the Island,” which actually sounds a little like the eye of the TARDIS. This magnetic light seems to have somehow turned Not-Jacob into Smokey — but’s also possible that it was sitting on top of Smokey, and Not-Jacob’s arrival is what set Smokey free. Whatever the relationship there is, the ability to turn into Smokey hasn’t helped Not-Jacob leave the island. There are rules, which involve not dying. Adam and Eve are Mother and Not-Jacob. The blond kid NotLocke sees is a young Jacob, either Not-Jacob’s remembrance of his brother or some kind of reincarnation.

All of this could have been avoided if Mother had just told the kids what the hell was going on. Instead, Mother played the young men off against each other, and the push-pull between Jacob and not-Jacob was going to keep going until one of them died, and maybe Not-Jacob thought that without his goody-goody brother blocking his way, he could leave the island. Or something. We’ll see. All I can say for sure is: the “Lost” creative team has three and a half hours left to answer a whole lot of questions. We’ve been along for the ride for this long, and I’m in for these last couple of weeks. But why do I feel a “Sopranos” ending coming on?