DVD REVIEW: Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian

In the first “Night at the Museum” movie, inventor Larry Daley (Ben Stiller) gets a job as a night guard at the Museum of Natural History, “where history comes alive” – except it actually does come alive, literally. Cool, huh? Something about a tablet… Anyway, in the sequel, two years have passed and three major changes have occurred: Larry (still Ben Stiller) is now a big-time successful inventor who owns his own company and the whole nine yards. Second, the museum is no longer losing money, but it is getting rid of most of its exhibits and replacing them with automated technology. And, third, Larry’s cool lady friend from the first one, the Sacajawea expert Rachel (or something like that)… well, she’s completely vanished from the face of the earth (but no one brings up this fact… hm)

Anyway, the tablet that brings all of the exhibits to life ends up being brought to… the Smithsonian!!! Bum-bum-buuuummm!!! Of course, the Smithsonian is the largest museum in the world that actually occupies seventeen different buildings museums all connected by a vast underground catacomb network… So, you can see where there’s going to be a problem here.

Ben Stiller is joined by his familiar friends, Teddy Roosevelt (Robin Williams), Jedediah (Owen Wilson), Octavius (Steve Googan), Dr. McPhee (Ricky Gervais) and, of course, everybody’s favorite monkey… DEXTER (Crystal)!! He is joined by Hank Azaria as the eeevil Kahmunrah, Bill Hader as the goofy General Custer, Amy Adams (awesome) as Amelia Earhart, and, everybody’s favorite flying monkey… ABLE (also Crystal, most of the time)!! The movie is directed by Shawn Levy (Night at the Museum).

So, now to actually review the movie (ah-ha, I’ll bet you thought I forgot!). Well, it was funny, at parts… OK, I’m just gonna come out with it…

The movie sucked.

The animation, which ROCKED in the first movie, was unrealistic, and fake-looking. It didn’t look as well-thought-out, and it looked like the animators got a bit big in the britches and decided to try and make it more realistic than it was ever going to be, or look good being.

In my opinion, the trailer made it seem funnier and have more of an impact than it did. All those scenes they show in the teasers? Those are the only funny parts in the whole movie. And it’s not that it wasn’t a comedy, it was trying very hard to be a comedy, but it just wasn’t funny to me. It was just… a bunch of people goofing off. And, the comedy was completely ruined by the many, many, many, many, many breaks for “emotional speeches that in no way develop the story or the characters, but looked nice in the script so what the heck”.

Now…before I tell you what was GOOD in the movie, let me tell you something else that you probably didn’t know.

The Jonas Brothers are in this movie. Now, that is either a good thing or a bad thing, because this world is full of either Jonas Brother lovers… or Jonas Brother haters. I am happy because the end song is my favorite Jonas Brother song, but it is also the only one I can stomach as I am part of the latter group). So, if you like them, good for you. You’ll enjoy their scenes. If you don’t, their scenes are really short, so DEAL WITH IT.

Now, the good parts of this horrible movie: I think Kahmunrah was funny, for one. His lisp and his speech patterns are absolutely hilarious! I laughed every time he came on the screen. His motive was shaky at best, though.

Also, I think the end was a clever, if a smidge predictable (I mean, we ALL know what’s happening at the end, don’t we?). I just think how they executed it was wonderful!

And, well…that’s about all I liked about it.  In the end, it was really just an excuse for a bunch of actors to goof off on stage with a monkey and a camera. Actually… that sounds like fun! Anyone know where I can sign up for Night at the Museum Three? (Let’s admit it, we all want to play with that monkey.)

Now, to review the DVD, which was better than the movie in my opinion.

The first thing you’re going to watch in any movie is, of course, the gag reel. To me, the first few bits aren’t that different, but after that, they’re FUNNY! I thoroughly enjoy watching actors making complete fools of themselves on camera, or just being plain goofballs… even more so than they were in the movie! I especially like the one where Kumanruah knocks the “invisible” green ninja over.

The education features were freakin’ wonderful (you know, the behind-the-scenes stuff). They contain really fun bits of information that really aren’t useful for anything outside of the movie itself, but are still good to know should it ever come up in conversation. I won’t reveal anything because if you’ve read this far, you probably plan on or already have gone through the special features. Just know that the special features have more humor than the movie does and are much more entertaining to the average joe who happened to enjoy the first movie AT ALL.

The second disk is entirely dedicated the Crystal (who plays Dexter and Able, just in case you forgot), and Squirt (Crystal’s trusted sidekick). I doubt the “Life of a Monkey Star”, or something of the sort, was real, but it was still entertaining, and, by golly, it had monkeys in it! In case you’re wondering, I REALLY like monkeys. I would do ANYTHING to have a pet monkey. But, see, there, I’m ranting!

If you were thinking you’d find a good follow-up for the first movie, this isn’t it. Maybe the third one (and I cringe as I say that) might be better (maybe…). And, if you enjoy the actors (AMY ADAMS!), you’ll love the special features. So, as a movie, on a scale of 1 to 20 (1 being the best), I’d give it about a…23. As far as special features go, numbero uno, one hundred percent. I’d recommend either renting it for a couple of nights, or borrowing it from a friend who just wanted to complete the collection (then you don’t have to pay ANY money!), but I wouldn’t buy it.